Discuss Rossetti's portrayal of relationships between men and women.
In the Victorian era men were seen as more dominant than women and therefore had the most control in the relationship. However, Rossetti portrays the woman as being more dominant. This is shown when the title "No, Thank You, John" is repeated at the end of the poem. This portrays the woman as having more control over the man in the relationship as the poem begins with a rejection which is then emphasised by the phrase being repeated at the end. This symbolises that "John" had no chance from the start and shouldn't continue to try. On the other hand, because the persona has to repeat her rejection, this implies to the reader that "John" is very stubborn, therefore undermining her sense of power, and the repetition infers that "John" has been rejected before but hasn't given up yet. Rossetti is implying that men didn't have a lot of respect for women's opinions even if they were in relationships with them.
Rossetti implies that women were exasperated by the behaviour of men and didn't always respect them even though they were expected to. This is shown in the first stanza when the persona quotes John through "do" and "pray"; this infers the persona doesn't feel much respect for John as she is doing an impersonation of him. This is further implying that women were exasperated by men's behaviour as she is making fun of the things he says and believes he is stupid. This portrays women as confident and determined to not get outspoken by men. The verb "pray" implies that John tried to persuade the persona to marry him by saying that's what a proper Christian would do; also, "pray" was a term of politeness in the Victorian era so John could be suggesting that the persona is rude to keep turning him down which makes the reader think he's very egotistical. However, by rejecting him, the persona is showing she has more power in their relationship and doesn't let his views control her.
On the other hand, Rossetti also portrays the relationship between men and women as equal. In the second stanza, the persona says "No fault of mine made me your toast" which shows she knew how pleased John would be if she married him but still said no as she valued her own opinion. Furthermore, the word "toast" shows that John went around boasting about having her when she hadn't even agreed yet. This symbolises how women belonged to their husbands or fathers in the Victorian era as John feels he can go round saying whatever he wants about her without asking for her opinion. As this was the general view in the Victorian era, a contemporary reader would think nothing of this view and would have experienced the consequences themselves. However, a modern reader would be horrified that men viewing another person as property was normal. Despite this, Rossetti portrays their relationship as equal when the persona says "No fault of mine" as she is not allowing John to make decisions for her. She refuses to allow John to view her as property as she's saying that just because John likes her doesn't make her his when she doesn't return his feelings.
However, even though Rossetti portrays the woman to be more dominant than the man, she still shows that men's opinions were considered more important at the time. This is shown through the rhythm of the poem. In the first three stanzas, when it's just the persona talking, the rhythm is steady. However, as soon as John starts talking, the rhythm breaks up in the first line of the fourth stanza "I have no heart?- Perhaps I have not". This implies that John got fed up of listening to her talk and started to interrupt because he didn't respect her. This symbolises the power imbalance as what women had to say was viewed as unimportant so John isn't allowing the persona to have her say. The rhetorical question "I have no heart?" has an incredulous tone which implies that the persona thinks that John said something stupid. Furthermore, this infers that the reason for why the rhythm of the poem gets interrupted here is because the persona is stopping speaking in amazement that John would interrupt her explaining her feelings because he thought his were more important.
In the poem, Rossetti portrays the persona as a strong figure in the relationship. This is shown in the second to last stanza when she suggests "Let us strike hands as hearty friends". This portrays her as a strong figure as shaking "hands" with someone is a very masculine action. Furthermore, by suggesting they stay "friends" it shows she is in control of the nature of their relationship. This is also controversial to Victorian etiquette as it would be contentious for a single man and woman to spend time alone together unless for romantic reasons.
The ABAB rhyming scheme gives the poem a lighter tone. This implies that the persona doesn't care about John that much and his proposal hasn't impacted her life that much. It also consolidates the impression she gives of being in total control as a proposal has the potential to affect her whole life but she has remained strong and not let it sway her. Furthermore, Rossetti portrays men as persistent and prideful as "John" is a very common name which means the character could be representing masculinity. Therefore, this is a very feminist view as this could symbolise the persona rejecting all men. In her life, Rossetti rejected three suitors because they didn't fit with her religious beliefs so by writing a poem about a woman vehemently rejecting a man due to her own preference, Rossetti could be encouraging women to make their own decisions and not let men's views dominate their lives.
In the poem, Rossetti portrays the persona as a strong figure in the relationship. This is shown in the second to last stanza when she suggests "Let us strike hands as hearty friends". This portrays her as a strong figure as shaking "hands" with someone is a very masculine action. Furthermore, by suggesting they stay "friends" it shows she is in control of the nature of their relationship. This is also controversial to Victorian etiquette as it would be contentious for a single man and woman to spend time alone together unless for romantic reasons.
The ABAB rhyming scheme gives the poem a lighter tone. This implies that the persona doesn't care about John that much and his proposal hasn't impacted her life that much. It also consolidates the impression she gives of being in total control as a proposal has the potential to affect her whole life but she has remained strong and not let it sway her. Furthermore, Rossetti portrays men as persistent and prideful as "John" is a very common name which means the character could be representing masculinity. Therefore, this is a very feminist view as this could symbolise the persona rejecting all men. In her life, Rossetti rejected three suitors because they didn't fit with her religious beliefs so by writing a poem about a woman vehemently rejecting a man due to her own preference, Rossetti could be encouraging women to make their own decisions and not let men's views dominate their lives.
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